Lawn Wars: Local Tactics
As soon as we entered the fray, ornaments began disappearing
			off our lawn, and new ones would appear there.
			
			
A Matter of Taste We put out a clump of fiddleheads It took a while to figure that out.
				
			
					 
			
					 
					
						early one Spring, and it was replaced
						with the Land of the Lakes butter girl.
						"If you've got fiddleheads,
						you need some butter." 
					
A Food Joke That's when I guessed who made it:
				
			
					 
			
					 
					
 
					
					 
				
						Steve and Claudette, who were running the
						restaurant. So I made an ornament of Claudette,
						jumping from the frying pan into the fire.
						Stuck it on their lawn. 
					
			
			
HUH? So I put out a skunk with its tail lifted.
				
			
					 
			
					 
					
						Next thing you know, it's gone,
						and there's a big question mark out front. 
					
			
			
Abducktion Later in the year I notice a Featherstone missing
				
			
					 
			
					 
				
						off the Flamingo Wagon (my pickup).
						I get this photo in the mail
						with the following note. 
					
NO WAY I refuse to be held up.
				
			
					 
			
					 
					
						
					
At the Quarter Moon I post this sign in the pub. Next day Pinky is thrown out on the lawn, Took me three months to discover
				
			
					 
			
					 
				
						with a bullet hole in his head.
						the culpret: Phil the eel fisherman. 
					
			
			
And... Gazing Ball Magic This Summer, when I put my new
				
			
					 
			
					 
					
						gazing ball on the lawn,
						the flamingoes began arriving overnight. 
					
					 
				
			
			
That's..
The way it goes.
			Put your artwork on the lawn,
			it becomes part of the local scene.