The Beasts of Bowdoinham
Some local caricatures, and a spirit of the Bay

David manages the Recycling Barn, and has been a pig farmer –– among other fragrant pursuits. This portrait was payback for an especially tasty exchange we indulged in.

Brother Bruce used to chase the wily eel, and his wife, Mel, had me make this slippery caricature. It's designed so she can wring his neck.

Later on I cooked up Mel as a racoon, so she could wrestle with that eel.

Just up the road from us lives the local discophile and DJ, Earl, who delivered the Brunswick paper from his pale green beater. This portrait mimics a old crank phonograph with Hurlin Earl's delivery wagon careening on top. When you turn the crank, the record and the car spins, and Earl flings the paper (in its orange plastic bag) over the top of the car.

Jimmy is another one of the River Rogues. His wife, Nina, had me cross him with one of those ducks he's always hunting. This is a duck-call portrait. Give wind to it and Jimmy blows it out his ass –– musically. Later they got divorced, so maybe there was a message in this.

The rude noises go both ways in this town. John had me make this portrait of Becky crossed with her horse. Pull her buckets and she dances. Wag her tail and she laughs. Naturally she gets the last whinny.

Marion runs the local grocery, and surrounds her house with bird feeders. When she saw this portrait Ron commissioned, she said "That isn't bird feed."

On the other hand, that's no bull. That's Ron, Master of the Grange, wielding his gavel. This was Marion's idea.

Brent is a master builder, who makes everything into a sensuous work of sculpture. He's also a Leo, which may be why he's pounding that nail with a cat's paw.

One of the great building projects of all times in Bowdoinham was the confabulation of the Merry B. She was to be the prototype for the Kennebec River Houseboat Corporation, and proved to be the biggest hole in the water anyone ever threw money into. That's Shorey acting Goofy, waving his money in the air. Nina is Mini beating him over the head with one of their antique flutes. Even this portrait kept losing its money. I swear it.

The Beasts of Bowdoinham wouldn't be complete without Eagles and Eels –– or Phil, the Great Trickster. This portrait mobile of him flaps its wings when you pull the strings, and the eel twists in his talons. Phil has a pretty good beak, too.

Phil's wife Glynnis got a moose ticket a few years back, and got her moose. She also likes to bowl, so for Christmas that year Phil had me make this Bowling Moose Cuckoo Clock. Not only does it keep time, but every hour on the hour Glynnis the Moose bowls while the clock calls cuckoo. That's what she thinks about Phil, too.

Dianne isn't with us any more, but her spirit is out there on the Bay, riding the wings of eagles.