Brentosaurus
All sorts of things poke up out of the ground in April. Although
it must be a shock to some of them, as raw as it's been. We had
a touch of the balmy back around Fool's Day, but it 's been cold,
wet, and nasty ever since. Even had snow on the daffodils last
week.
Crocus
Daffy
None of which has completely stifled the silly season. About the
time his crew finished working on Henry and Marty's mausoleum,
Brent caught a touch of spring fever, and set to work on the dinosaur
he's been threatening to make for years. Spiraled most of the
framing ribs out of a single sheet of plywood, and started setting
the beast up in three sections. Was talking about maybe a 20 foot
dino. By the time he was done it was 30 feet, and filled his shop.
Brent has been playing with cement for a while now. Was dreaming
about casting lawn ornaments, statuary, and other amusements,
but once into the mud he got carried away. Conjured up forms for
gigantic rocking chairs with rebar stiffening. The kind of furniture
you have to pull around with your pickup. The way they dwarf anyone
sitting in them is a hoot.
Kid's Rocker
Work Site
The trouble with dreams is they come true, and Brent soon got
a commission to fabricate some fancy cement and cedar lawn ornaments
for naval housing. Although the contract probably referred to
"architectural detailing." Which job was a quick education in
rubber mold making. So the man was officially tooled and blooded
in the ornamental cement business, government approved.
The Brentosaurus was his first excursion into large-scale stucco
work. Its frames are bridged with chickenwire, covered with screening,
then stuccoed. For the head Brent carved a core out of a Styrofoam
flotation billet. Slick.
Inside the Beast
Heads down
As with all spring madness, the Brentosaurus took over, and the
boys hardly saw Brent on a worksite at all until the frenzy was
over. The monster was assembled in Jo's garden one afternoon,
while she was teaching, and the pieces mated perfectly. I hadn't
realized the neck and head would stand straight up: the towering
effect was stunning. Brent immediately got a request to make another
for Sugar Ray. I'm not sure this is a likely internet item, though.
Hard to FedEx.
After the dino was erected, Brent immediately critiqued it. Turned
it 180 degrees, and added more meat to the body. This first antediluvianism
is still a work in progress, and Brent has a mad gleam to populate
East Bowdoinham with a largess of lizards.
Other illusions slither out into the light at this waiting time.
The Town Hall Uglification project is well underway, diminishing
the one truly striking piece of architecture in the village. At
least the stark simplicity of the building can still be admired
from the back side.
Now a new architectural attraction has been proposed for the town
landing: a fast food trailer. The Canoe Club seems determined
to shoot themselves in the bilge down there. Ever since the landing
was clearcut to improve it, the fiascoes have stood in line for
admission. The plantings have drowned, or died of thirst. Frank's
outhouse came out crooked, but it IS charming to have a miniature
replica of a train station to take a leak in. Kids insist on throwing
the riprap into the drink. We've become the destination resort
for every jetskier in three counties. Parking in the lot is a
weekend nightmare. And there are so many boats in the anchorage
that the harbormaster is stepping on toes trying to figure out
moorings. Some of the oldtimers refer to him as The Harborfuhrer.
Alley Oop
Now a new couple in town have applied to install a snack shack
on the lawn at the landing. These enterprising folks are freshly
arrived from California, and say they want to "put Bowdoinham
on the map." Talk about designer ice creams. The Canoe Club is
all in favor of chow to go at the float, but others don't find
the idea too appetizing. Marion does a good business in take out
at the grocery, and Eric and Angie depend on the marginal trade
to stay afloat. Keeping a local restaurant alive is a juggling
act, and it doesn't help to have someone give you a shove.
Jeanine wore herself ragged building up the restaurant. Now Eric
and Angie are trying to buy it. They've all shown that they can
bring in new customers by varying the menu and providing responsive
service. Working long hours with a smile. For some of us it's
a home away from home. They aren't about to lose their core customers,
but the business hangs by a thread some weeks, and the thought
of a casual interloper with a knife doesn't go down too well.
This trailer operation would be a stone's throw away.
Brentosaurus
Fiddles
Once again the town may be rushing to judgment without considering
the consequences. There's nothing wrong with free enterprise,
but is it fair for the town to subsidize a new competitor to established
businesses, and risk their survival? The town can't charge rental
space at the landing, because the improvements were done with
state and federal funds and donations. Meanwhile the restaurant
pays substantial taxes to the town. A snack shack would amount
to a tax-free gift to these folks. It's one thing to be welcoming
to strangers, it's another to give them the store.
Beyond the injustice of penalizing the store and the restaurant,
nobody has addressed the issue of future uses at the landing,
or their physical impact. A popular eatery would aggravate an
already unpleasant parking situation. The landing committee is
currently planting new trees alongside the rail line, which will
further restrict boat trailer parking. How much additional traffic
will it take to support a lunch wagon, and does the town want
to attract more transient activity there?
DeeDee
A Raw Day
Without any consensus on businesses at the landing, how will the
town decide where to draw the line, if at all? Now we have evening
concerts there during the summer, with refreshments by the Ladies'
Auxiliary. Will this snack shack preclude those donations? Should
it? What about a penny arcade? A ferris wheel? Or, more likely,
a bait and tackle stand? How can the town say yes to one small
business, and deny another? On the other hand, how can the town
restrict business development in the resource protection zone
(waterfront), and permit a free-for-all at the landing?
I'll be glad when April is over.
Freak Beach is dead, but maybe there's hope for a Carny Corner,
yet. Brent could install a half dozen Brentosauri by the docks.
Maybe this lunch wagon would sell Bronto Burgers and Stego-sodas.
We might peddle lizard skin tattoos, T-Rex T-shirts, and Neanderthal
paraphernalia. Bring in the teenagers. The possibilities of really
civilizing this burg make your mouth water.
Just follow me